You now that one article, perhaps you found it on your feed or linked to a newsletter, and that article will not go away? This is what happened to me when I read Heather Plett's, "What it Means to 'Hold Space' for People, Plus Eight Tips on How to Do it Well". Heather gives us 8 wonderful, clearly defined tips for helping us understand how we can help others via the story of when she held space for another. It is meaningful, and magical. Her article then kicked off a whole pondering on the meaning of space holding, how season's hold space, how vessels hold space, and how we do so for one another. Go ahead and read it, I'll wait... As a Tarot professional, my fist thought is often, 'How can I use Tarot to help me gain access to this? How can I teach or communicate this to others or for myself when I am confused about how that might look in my life and with another?" So I created a spread based on Heather's 8 tips, here they are below: When Compassion is Needed Spread Use this when someone is hurting, or lost, or it feels unredeemable... Lay them out any old way that feels good to you... Hold your cards after shuffling and imagine the person in need of your compassion being held by you. Whether that is a visualization of actually holding them (or you are the sea and they are floating, or you are the sky and they are a star) see that your space holding has an energetic effect, your intended is glowing with your concern; not changing them or judging them, just accepting them entirely; allowing them to feel your quiet space-holding. As you visualize the holding, pull 9 cards with the following questions: 1 card: What do I inuitively already know about this person? 1 card: What information does this person need from me? 1 card: In what areas do I need to back off? 1 card: How is my Ego keeping me from holding space? 1 card: How can I best communicate that there is no one right way to heal? 1 card: How can I most guide and help? 2 cards: How can I best hold space during difficult emotions?/become triggered 1 card: What areas of holding space for them might be a challenge for me?
1 card: What do I inuitively already know about this person? 6 of Swords- The card of the mourner, she is still very sad but moving away from that. She is not stuck. 1 card: What information does this person need from me? Page of Cups- She needs my positivity and brightness, she needs ideas and new things to consider. Distraction even. 1 card: In what areas do I need to back off? 6 of Wands- Stop telling her that it will, "Be ok." She can be not ok, I can and should honor her where she is rather than mitigating that into a future story (while minimizing the now). 1 card: How is my Ego keeping me from holding space? 10 of Swords- My own pain of loss from the past keeps throwing my own story in front of my face, rather than attending to hers. 1 card: How can I best communicate that there is no one right way to heal? Temperance- Being patient, focusing on balance, the Angel is literally holding two vessels, how can it be a clearer card for space-holding? ( I tend to focus on outcomes and fixing things so this while obvious, is sometimes against my nature). 1 card: How can I most guide and help? 2 of Cups- Love her, listen to her, see her. Don't "do" anything. 2 cards: How can I best hold space during difficult emotions?/ become triggered? The Magician/3 Swords-- The Magician has one hand to the heavens, and one to the group. Again, conduit (vessel) energy, be a grounding expansiveness. As a 'fixer' who likes dynamic energy, I am reminded that the tension of holding something that is transmuting is dynamic. Holding a live wire, we are the grounding element. Also, The pain of her heartbreak can trigger my own heartbreak for her. 1 card: What areas of holding space for them might be a challenge for me? Knight of Swords- a Revision of what was said, don't try to "do" or fix or come to a conclusion, do not rush this ambiguity out of anxiety, refer back to both Temperance and the Magician- conduit energy. As you see... this spread, while simple, is unbelievably helpful and profound. You can use it with people, with animals, with revolutions, with those who you do not understand and do not agree, with the things that are inexplicable, and with your own states like when you are feeling anxious and scared and need to hold space for your own damn self.
Love you.
1 Comment
3/22/2015 12:52:42 am
This is profound and dynamic. I will find this reading a very useful tool in my practice. Thank you, Jenna. Love you, too!
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Jenna Matlin
M.S. in Organizational Psychology and Leadership Categories
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